Why do Westerners complain about everything, from traffic to toast temperature, while Indonesians smile through power cuts, floods, and endless honking in Jakarta?

In this special episode of the Indo Prancis Podcast, we (Rémy, French entrepreneur, and Savira, Jakarta-born baker) dive into the most striking cultural differences we experience as a real-life French-Indonesian couple.

And trust us: from being « fashionably late » to never saying « no », the contrast runs deep. But it’s also what makes our love story, and life in Indonesia, so damn interesting.

Why do westerners complain so much?

Rémy opens up about how, coming from France, he noticed something odd: expats in Indonesia are always whining.
The heat, the rules, the traffic, the lack of cheese.

Meanwhile, Indonesians just get on with it. Even when the rain floods the roads or when the Grab driver takes 35 minutes to arrive.

« C’est pas grave » meets « sabar ya ». One culture vents. The other breathes.

Fun fact: A 2022 HSBC expat survey ranked Indonesia in the top 10 happiest places to live for emotional well-being, despite its chaotic infrastructure.

The magical art of not saying no

If you ask an Indonesian, « Can we meet at 5pm? », and the answer is silence, a nod, or a laugh… the answer is probably no.

Savira explains how saying « no » directly is often seen as too harsh or impolite. Instead, people say « we’ll see » or simply ghost you (politely).

In France, you’d get a firm yes or a blunt no. In Indonesia, you get an emotional dance.

This trait has even been explored in research on Asian communication styles, where maintaining harmony is often more important than clarity.

Time doesn’t flow the same way in Jakarta

Time in Indonesia is flexible. And by flexible, we mean… fluid like lava. If someone says they’ll be there at 10am, expect them by 10:45am. Maybe.

For many Westerners, this drives them insane. But for Indonesians, it’s just life. Priorities are relational, not punctual.

Rémy had to unlearn his obsession with being on time. Now, he still panics at delays… but at least he does it with a cake in hand.

Jakarta vs Bali: Chaos and calm

We explore the vibe clash between Jakarta and Bali. Jakarta is noise, scooters, construction, deals. Bali is flow, incense, coconut lattes, remote work.

Yet both are deeply Indonesian. Jakarta is where things get done.
Bali is where they get forgotten (or forgiven).

Learn more about Bali’s digital nomad scene here: Nomad List Bali.

Cross-cultural love in action

What does it mean to build a life between two radically different cultures? It means misunderstanding each other constantly, laughing at it, and baking together through it.

During the episode, Savira prepared her famous marble cake from her brand Sapaserrie while recording in Jakarta.

This wasn’t just a podcast episode. It was a moment of everyday joy, sweetness, and love.

Brightspot and Indonesia’s creative boom

We also touch on Brightspot Market, the hub of Indonesia’s buzzing creative scene. It’s chaotic, youthful, wildly inventive, a lot like Jakarta itself.

You won’t find a quiet French-style boutique. But you will find a streetwear pop-up that serves matcha and NFTs.

Bonus: Want to dive deeper? Check out our article on Jakarta’s entrepreneurial spirit.

Conclusion: Why it all matters

Whether you’re part of a multicultural couple, living abroad, or just curious about why cultures clash and connect, this episode is for you.

Understanding each other means more than learning a language or eating the same food. It means not losing your mind when your partner says, « maybe » instead of « no ». It means loving the mess, not fixing it.

So next time your Grab is late, remember: breathe. And maybe bring cake.

FAQ

Why do Indonesians avoid saying « no » directly?
Because politeness and preserving social harmony often take precedence over clarity.

Are Westerners really more negative?
Not always, but many cultures in Europe or North America are more individualistic and verbal, so direct complaints are more accepted.

Is being late really normal in Indonesia?
Yes, it’s part of a cultural approach where relationships often matter more than clock precision.

Listen now on Spotify, Apple Podcasts & Deezer.

Follow us on Instagram: @sapaserrie

Recorded in Jakarta. With laughs, cake, and a lot of love.